Wedding Day [Edward]

[Bella Swan]

It all felt so surreal. Here I was, staring at a pair of stained glass, french doors with a nervous anticipation fluttering around in the pit of my stomach. Everything seemed to be happening so quickly... I didn't feel prepared for what was coming.

"30 seconds until showtime," Alice's voice chimed lyrically from my left. I looked at her, eye's doubling in size as she handed me the bouqet.
"I'm not ready," my voice sounded panicky and frantic. My heart rate sped up dramatically and I could feel my breaths come in short, shallow gasps.
"Don't be rediculous, Bella," Angela Weber appeared at my right side with a grin, "you want this!"
"No... I mean... not now!" I pleaded with the pair, but they ignored me completely. It was as if I wasn't even there...

Music erupted from behind the door, drawing my attention in as if on command. The doors swung open fluently. The scene infront of me was shocking. A long isle ran directly through the center of a large, chapel-like room with pews lining either side. It was all dark wood, with bright red roses and petal scattered everywhere. If I was in my right state of mind, I might have even said that it was... beautiful.

Giving me an reassuring smile, Alice stepped forward and gracefully danced in pace with the song, holding a bouqet of her own red roses. As if on cue, Rosalie followed close behind her and then Angela. My eye's were still wide, and my breath continued to speed up until before I knew it, my legs were carrying me onward.

I couldn't control it, no matter how hard I tried, my legs continued to drag me towards the alter.
"Someone please help!" I cried and looked through the crowd of unfamiliar faces for someone. My mother and Phil stood at the front, beaming with joy at me. What was wrong with her?! This wasn't how she responded when I called her!

A new thought erupted in my mind. Where was Charlie? Wasn't he supposed to be walking my up the isle? That was the way things were at every other wedding I had ever attended. But something in the back of my head told me that he wouldn't be here tonight. He had never supported my decision, so why would he be here now?

I felt a small tear escape and a wave of sadness and anger filled all emotional space in my heart. It ached suddenly with an uncontrollable pain. I didn't want to do this anymore, I didn't want to be here... It wasn't worth it...

But my eye's, though tear-filled, turned forward and I saw him. It was like the perfectly sculpted picture, even with his back facing me. He stood there, at the front with Emmett and Jasper. Edward. He was my life, my soul, my everything...

Biting my bottom lip, I made it to the front of the church and everyone the seated. The beautiful music ceased to play and I sighed in defeat. This was how it was meant to be, how it was supposed to be. This was fate.

"Edward?" I questioned his back and tilted my head slightly to the left. Why wasn't he looking at me? "Edward," I repeated his name and tugged gently on his shoulder.

My heart did something weird, something it had never before done as the guy infront of me turned. I couldn't describe it if I tried.
"Hiya Bella," the husky voice said and I saw that boyish grin look at me-'

Sitting up suddenly, Bella looked frantically through the dark, gasping for air. What had just happened? She began to hyperventilate as she felt her eye's soaked in dampness. It was as if someone had just punched her in the head, a splitting headache struck her and she quietly whimpered. What the hell kind of dream was that?!

[edwardcullen]

Silently Edward watched Bella from his place in the snug chair, which was located across from her bed. A look of curiosity played across his polished features as he listened to her mumbling through her sleep. It wasn’t anything new, so he didn’t worry too much. He just hoped she would wake from the nightmare soon enough. He hated watching her facial expressions contort due to her nightmares. His fingers were entwined loosely together and resting idly on his lap. His expression grave as he wondered what Bella could possibly be dreaming about this time. Edward couldn’t help but worry about Bella constantly. It was as if she was the world most powerful magnet…for danger. If he could he would keep her by her side always and protect her from anything and everything. But he knew she needed space, just as anyone else did. She was absolutely perfect for him. He couldn’t explain it…his irrevocable love for her. She held him in such a tight grip; he could not imagine life without her. He had already experienced what it was like without his heart, and he never wanted to experience it again. It was unbearable for Edward, being away from his beloved.

As Bella’s rustling became a bit more profound, Edward suddenly and without a sound lifted himself off of the chair and onto his feet, making his way to Bella’s side in one swift movement. He watched her more closely; she was beautiful even in disarray. He lifted a hand to move the hair, which was sticking to the dampness rimming her locked lids. He frowned deeply as he noticed the soggy tears, he did not like this in the least. He kept a small distance from her, in order not to send her into shivers. He knew his cold temperature couldn’t be comfortable to a human. He remembered the time in the tent just before the battle with the newborns; his jaw clenched at the memory of Jacob Black crawling into the sleeping bag and being able to keep Bella warm, her shivers vanishing in a matter of seconds. It had bothered him that he was unable to keep her warm. He didn’t like Jacob Black having any advantage over him… even the slightest advantage.

Suddenly, Bella was awake and sitting up beside him. Her chest rising and falling as she gasped for air. Edward looked over to her coolly and patiently waited for her to notice his presence. Her whimpering made him rather uneasy and he studied her expression for any clue as to what could have possibly brought on those tears and such a negative reaction.

[Bella Swan]

It took a minute for her eye's to adjust to the lightless night, but once they did, Bella immediately looked for the face that she so desperately needed to see.
He was there, at Bella's side, just as he always was when she needed him. Immediately, the human threw her arms around Edward's neck, looking for some form of comfort, something to signify to her that all of that was just a dream. She buried her face into Edward's solid, cold shoulder and tried to steady her jagged breathing.

As soon as the dream had come, it seemed to escape her memory. All Bella remembered was Jacob's face... A pang of guilt hit her and she frowned. Why would her mind allow her to experience something so... bad? Not that it was bad, just very not good and confusing.
"I'm sorry," she wispered into Edward's shirt.

[edwardcullen]

Edwards frown softed ever so slightly as Bella threw her arms around him. He wrapped his arms around her gently, very careful not to hurt her. That would be the last thing Edward wanted. His lips pressed a small kiss onto the open and slightly clammy space of her forehead. It felt just right being here for her the way he was. Though he never once forgot how easily everything could fall apart and he could lose her. He removed his icy cold lips from Bella's forehead and pulled away from her just a bit in order to look her in the eyes. "You were mumbling in your sleep again, love. Is everything alright?" he asked with clear concern scribbled all over his face. He hoped she would tell him what the nightmare was all about. He absolutely hated not being able to hear her thoughts, at times it drove him quite mad.

Edwards frown returned full fledged at her apology. Bella could be quite silly at times. He shook his head swiftly and lifted her chin up so he could see her face. "Bella, what are you sorry for? It was only a bad dream..." he assured her, smiling a brilliant smile her way and hoping it would make her feel better, or at least soften her up a little. "Want to tell me what it was about?" he asked hopefully, though he kept his tone cool and collected. He was always curious as to what went on in Bella's mind. He had never met another human who was immune to his ability.

[Bella Swan]

Bella seemed to melt as that perfect smile crossed Edward's angelic features. For a moment, she even lost her train of thought. That was the kind of power he held over her, though at times she was afraid to admit it.
Regaining her mental stability, a conflicted look seemed to shadow Bella's very human face as she contemplated telling Edward the dream. Would it hurt him to hear it? The whole thing was a little embarassing for her...

A soft blush arose in Bella's cheeks as she stayed silent and slowly shook her head. Very reluctantly, she removed her arms from around Edward's neck and got an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"It would hurt you too much," she spoke softly, knowing that Charlie was sleeping in a room just down the hall from her.

[edwardcullen]

Edward stroked the girls hair softly and watched as the her cheeks flushed a few shades brighter than their usual translucent color. When he had first met Bella this would have driven him quite crazy for he barely had control over the desire that her blood drove into him. As time passed, however, he had learned to resist any urge that her blood gave him and almost could completely ignore it by now. With a soft and short sigh Edward lowered his hand into that of his love beside him. Hurt him too much? how would it hurt him? He quirked one brow and tilted his head some, a puzzled look coming across his features. "Bella, you can tell me anything. You know that." he assured her.

What could it have been? Something that would hurt him, obviously. Or something that she would assume would hurt him. He couldn't be sure exactly. He guessed maybe him doing something to hurt her again? That would hurt him. Or perhaps... Jacob Black? His brow furrowed at the thought. He had told her that whatever she decided on doing, he would let her do. Whether it was marrying him or staying with the werewolf. He only wanted for Bella to be happy. That was all he ever wanted, for her to be safe and happy. That is why he had left in the first place. He had wanted her to live a happy, normal, human life. Though that plan had backfired completely.

[Bella Swan]

Bella knew full well that even the smallest glance at Edward would cause her to spill everything to him. She closed her eye's and tried to remember the extent of the dream. There was Jake, than the fact that Charlie wasn't there... OH! Rene and Phil at the front pew...
Letting a long and drawn out sigh escape her lips, Bella took what Edward had said into consideration. She just didn't want to hurt him... but was not telling him hurting him in a way? It was just a dream after all, but it was Bella's subconscious that thought of it in the first place.

Biting lightly on her lower lip, Bella opened her eye's and turned to face Edward. Everything about him was perfect, from the way he wore his hair, to the sound of his voice. It seemed impossible to hide anything from him, but Bella had tried... in the end she always ended up giving in. She pulled her knee's to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Bella rested her chin on the top of her knee's and opened her mouth a fraction, as if to say something. At the last moment, she closed her mouth and stayed silent. The prolonged anticipation was probably annoying him... but Bella just couldn't say it.

"Ugh!" she said in quiet exasperation, why was she always so difficult about things?! Bella shook her head at the inner conflict she was undergoing and decided that it was best she just give in once again.
"Alright, I don't remember much but there was a church and it was the wedding day," she began in a rushed wisper, "I think Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper were there... I didn't see Carlisle or Esme... but I was walking up the isle..."
Bella paused, wondering whether she should inclued the fact that she was being dragged up to the front.
'Better leave that to another day.'

"...and then I thought 'Where's Charlie?' but he wasn't there. He never showed up for the wedding because he didn't approve," Bella's face fell suddenly, feeling that same pain she had in her dream. What if that happened in real life?
"If that wasn't bad enough," she continued in an even quieter voice, "when I got to the front of the chapel, the person I was going to marry wasn't actually you... it was Jake."

Her eye's immediately turned to the bed infront of her. Bella didn't even want to imagine Edwards reaction, whatever that may be. She knew that the next few weeks were going to be difficult, and then progressively more so after that. Jacob hadn't RSVP'd yet, so maybe that was the reason Bella's mind had been playing tricks on her.

"It was just a dream though," Bella's voice sounded like nothing but air, but she knew Edward would still hear it, "it was just a stupid, meaningless dream."

[edwardcullen]

Edward sat motionless on the bed next to her. He watched her expression and understood that she was deciding whether or not it was best for her to reveal the dream to him or to keep it to herself. Could it really have been that bad? He couldn’t pinpoint what exactly about Bella’s expression it was, but it was making an uneasy feeling begin to erupt in his stomach. He didn’t like it when she kept such things from him. Especially when it was obviously something that would bother him and that apparently bothered her in her sleep. It was important in one way or another and he felt as if he needed to know. Edward’s eyebrows shot up expectantly as her lips parted as if to speak, but they were quickly lowered into a small frown as they were pressed back together. He let out a small and inaudible sigh as he waited, the anxiousness inside him growing more by the minute. He kept his eyes carefully on hers, trying to read through them and into her mind. She could really just be so frustrating at times, what with her closed mind and her refusal to let him in on it. He wondered how long exactly she would take before she would disclose this private and most likely vital information with him.

Just as the thoughts crossed his mind, Bella spoke. His eyes widened with genuine interest and concentration. He listened closely to every word she spoke. Of course, the wedding. She would be having nightmares about that, as she had made it quite clear how much she did not want to marry at such a young age. He had to remember to thank her mother for injecting her full of fear. Edward didn’t believe that Bella and him had the same fate as her mother and father. After all, they couldn’t be without each other. They wouldn’t be leaving each other - or so he hoped. Jacob Black seemed to be an issue, which he did not overlook. He just hoped that Bella’s love for him was as intense and unconditional as his own for her. He nodded with utter understanding as she mentioned Charlie being absent from the wedding. He could understand her fear of having to get married without her father’s blessing. He very much wished that Charlie would understand how much in love Edward was with Bella, and she with he. And also that he would see that Edward would never mistreat her or let any harm come to her. He hoped that in time Charlie would realize that this marriage was not a mistake. Of course, he couldn’t blame Charlie for being upset. The condition for his daughter marrying Edward was that Edward turn her into a vampire, after all.

Edward’s face dropped as that last line of description left Bella’s lips. So it was Jacob Black. He suppressed a bitter, rigid laugh and his eyes glided to the side, looking at no place in particular, silence stretching out across the room. He understood that Bella was in love with him as well. He couldn’t be upset about it. He had left Bella alone for such a long period of time. It had been his mistake and now he was paying the consequences for his ludicrous decision. Jacob Black had been there for Bella when Edward had not. He could not have expected for feelings not to develop. He had pulled her from what she had described as her lifeless period. Edward’s expression changed as he winced at the thought, a stab of pain coming to what would have been his heart. It hurt him intolerably to think of how much pain he had inflicted upon Bella. He wished he could take it all back. He allowed the silence between them to drag on as he thought through all of these things. Jacob had kept her safe when he had not. Finally he spoke, his voice as soft as velvet. “Bella, I know that you are not anticipating this wedding. If you would like, we could simply tell Alice that you are not ready and we can wait as long as you’d like. You know I have no problem with waiting a few years. I’ve told you this before.” He paused for a moment to glance back in her direction. “I’ve also let you know that I have given you the choice. You are free to do and choose whatever and whoever you want, love. I will always understand.” He finished this last sentence almost inaudibly, not quite to himself.

[Bella Swan]

From the time Edward had opened his mouth, Bella looked at him with a slightly horrified expression. Those words seemed to get harder and harder to hear everytime he spoke them. Shaking her head slowly, Bella could feel her heart ache at the idea of not being with Edward. No, it wasn't just her heart, Bella's everything seemed to crumble into nothingness. She had already suffered through that experience once, but a lifetime without him? Bella could feel herself breaking just by thinking it...

Also, holding off on the wedding for a few more years? Bella wouldn't last that long... The deal she and Edward had made was that he would turn Bella, so long as they were married first. Not being married meant not being a Vampire. And not being a Vampire meant being a human and aging to God only knows how old. Bella cringed at the thought. She was already a year older than him... in a way. Even one year seemed like an entire lifetime to her.

"Never," Bella said softly, "no, Edward, I don't want to hold off the wedding and I don't want to be with anyone else but you. I'll tell you a million times and my mind will never change. I love you."
She forced as much sincerity as possible into her words because, well, they were true. But there was also a slightly more hesitant truth that she held. Yes, Bella loved Edward more than life itself but... she was also inlove with Jacob. She felt terrible about it, about having to live in knowing that Edward knew he wasn't the only one.

[edwardcullen]

Edward looked at Bella in silence for a few moments. He wasn't sure what to make of the dream. It was obviously in her subconcious, which probably meant she was still struggling with having to lose Jacob. He inhaled a deep breath before oferring her his best smile. He didn't want to continue on making her stressed. She needed her rest. "Okay, Bella. Just fall back into sleep." he suggested, pulling her close to him and lying them both back against the bed. He hummed her lullaby softly, trying to sooth her back to sleep before stopping quick in the middle to voice a thought. "What if I try to speak to Charlie about this situation?" he asked, quirking a brow. He could always try. There was nothing to lose, really. Maybe he could convince Charlie that this was not a mistake.

He knew Alice was excited for the wedding. But to be honest, waiting a few more years was what seemed to be the right thing to do. Bella should see that she would feel much more comfortable after waiting until the right time. Who knows? maybe she would realize that being a human was much more inviting than being a Vampire. He certainly hoped so. That would also give Bella enough time to really think through what she would want. He didn't want her to make any rash decisions.

[Bella Swan]

There was another reason why Bella didn't want to hold off on the wedding... and she tried to push this thought to the farthest corners of her mind. If she wasn't turned soon, there was a worse fate that lay ahead for her, and it definitely wasn't old age. Bella shuddered slightly at the thought. Volturi. Even Edward wouldn't be able to protect her from being torn limb from limb by them.

Bella seemed to curl up beside Edward, and she was even used to the brisk cold that seemed to radiate from him. She always felt safe with him, even though she knew she shouldn't. Letting out a long and comfortable sigh, Bella tried her best to forget all of the thoughts that seemed to float around in her head. The sound of Edward's beautiful voice filled her ears and Bella forced her eyes closed.

'What if I try to speak to Charlie about this situation?'
She heard Edward say and thought about it for a moment. There was no way Charlie would listen to what Edward say... but then again Edward had a tendency to be very persuasive.

"Do you think that would work?" Bella questioned in a tired voice.

[edwardcullen]

Edwards palms pressed against Bella's arms and he rubbed them softly. He wasn't sure if speaking to Charlie would work but it was definitely worth a shot. What's the worst that could happen? He thought through all this quietly and to himself. He would definitely try to speak to Charlie soon. He knew how much Bella meant to Charlie and he also knew how much Charlie meant to Bella. He wouldn't just ignore that fact and let Bella get married without her father walking her down the aisle. No, everything needed to be perfect for his Bella and he would make sure that everything was. Bella deserved the world and he would give it to her. He loved her intensely and nothing or anyone, especially not a hot tempered Werewolf, would get in the way.

He looked down at Bella with soft eyes, reading the tired expression in hers. He wouldn't keep her from sleep any longer. This matter could wait until later. He only wanted to sleep and have good dreams. After all, she had screamed "No!" when she had woken up. That had to count for something. He was worrying over nothing. "Lets just leave this discussion for when the time is right, love. Close your eyes and sleep." he leaned in to place his lips onto hers for a fraction of a moment before pulling away and pulling her head onto his chest. He enjoyed lying in bed with her. It was soothing and it have him time to think over things. And when she would wake up, her eyes were always those of satisfaction at seeing him there. What more could he ask for?

[Bella Swan]

Nodding silently, Bella's eyes closed once again and she yawned a bit, wondering what time it was. Hopefully not too late... she didn't really want to be tired in the morning.
Bella was exhausted, but that didn't really meant that she would always get to sleep. Eyes remaining shut tight, Bella inwardly sighed, glad that Edward couldn't read her thoughts. It was an advantage point at times like these, when she was pretending to sleep.

Inhaling steadily, as if she was having a restful night, Bella took in Edwards scent, thinking about how many days were left of this. Of her sleeping in her bed, of her being in this familiar house around all of these familiar people. Of Bella being human. Her day's were numbered, that was for sure... maybe she was having second thoughts?

As soon as these thoughts struck her, Bella found herself drifting off into a dreamless sleep.